Recently I read this book and loved it. The premise is a family who moves to France and in turn helps their picky eaters learn to enjoy and eat a variety of good foods. I was referred to this book by a friend who said it really helped their family, so I wanted to give it a try. We have a picky eater and have made the mistake of many times letting him choose what he wants to eat. I have done such a disservice to him. Here I am making creative healthy foods for Grant and me. And instead of wanting to sit at the table and listen to whining or get in a fight, we many times fix the kids something else to eat, as if they know what's best for them - as if 5 and 2 year olds know their foods and nutrients. Much of the time I will make something quick and easy which are processed foods that are not healthy or even good food for my kids. I started to feel like a hypocrite as I am trying to help others enjoy delicious whole and healthy foods, and yet I don't want to make the "time" or "effort" to do the same for my kids.
After reading this book it gave me some great tips and ideas. If you know me, when I like an idea or see something helpful I go for it, like all out. So we are implementing some of these ideas.
One of the main things the French do is eat for pleasure. They eat because it is enjoyable to them. They eat good and whole foods and they look forward to it. I want Holden and Carter Mae to enjoy eating and never see it as something negative or something they have to police. If we can teach them now when they are young we will help them be ahead of the game when they can choose on their own.
As the researchers concluded: “Pleasure was a crucial dimension of nutrition, emphasized by both parents and children. Here, French kids’ attitudes echo those of their parents, just like those of kids anywhere. In international surveys, North Americans associate food most with health and least with pleasure. The French are at the opposite extreme: they are the most pleasure-oriented and the least health-oriented about food." But even though they don't associate food only with health and wellness, they eat good and healthy, whole foods. They have one of the lowest rates of obesisty amoung young children. They teach their children by example at a very early age that variety and whole foods are what is to be in their body. Instead of making that rule because its "healthy," the make it because the best tasting food is whole and healthy foods and should be enjoyed. They shop at farmer's markets, take the time to prepare meals at home, and processed foods are not really in their vocabulary. Seems like a pretty different world then I find myself in. The family in the book came back to live in America and are still using many of these rules in their daily life. It has been a bit more of challenge since North American food habits are so different then the French, but they are making it work and taking the time to teach their children the right way to view food.
Here are some tips that I enjoyed from the book and will start to implement in our own family.
1. Parents: YOU are in charge of food education!
This means we as parents need to eat well, so our kids will follow our lead.
2. Avoid emotional eating. NO food rewards, bribes.
This one will be hard for us. Who doesn't say, if you go to the dentist you get some candy. (like that makes sense) We will get you a donut if you are nice to your sister. Seriously, it just sounds so bad even writing it, but we do it all the time.
3. Parents schedule meals and menus. Kids eat what adults eat. No short-order cooking.
We have not been great at this. Usually the kids eat something completely different than we do. This week we have changed the RULES, Holden is not a happy camper, but he has tried some new things and has actually liked them.
4. Eat family meals together. No distractions.
I love this one. I tend to eat super fast. My son is like a snail. He could sit at the table for a straight hour and just nibble and talk and talk. Usually I am putting away the dishes while he is still eating. I am trying to stop this. Enjoy the conversation and know that dinner time is "family time." It's not just about eating, it's about enjoying food and TIME together.
5. Eat your veggies. Key: Think "variety."
6. You don't have to LIKE it, but you do have to TASTE it.
This is the one we have implemented the most. Sometimes this takes 25 minutes to get Holden to try. But instead of being frustrated and pushy like I used to be,we are very calm and now he knows this is the rule so he is getting more used to it. It doesn't mean he likes it. But the French swear by continuing to introduce foods over and over again and they will finally like it. We are waiting for that to happen. He's already eaten 2 things that he has never eaten before. YAY!
7. No snacking! It's OK to feel hungry between meals.
This is why our kids are not hungry. So now they get a snack right after school and that is it.
8. SLOW FOOD is happy food
9. Eat mostly real food. Treats are OK for special occasions.
We will always have our Saturday Donut Day. It's our special day. And eaten in moderation it's not going to kill us.
10. Remember: Eating is joyful.
And here's hoping this happens. I love how the French prepare the table and foods with a certain presentation. So I have asked Holden to help me set the table with tablecloths and fun plates.
"Eating well doesn’t arise from guilt, and eating isn’t an anxious exercise. For the French, the enjoyment of eating arises because they slow down, savor their food, and find deep meaning in sharing it with other people."
Let's try to practice this for not just our kids but for ourselves. Making healthy whole foods creative and fun, I think is the key to the food battle that many times overcome us. Sometimes we stress about food. We stress about what to eat, how many calories can we eat, what should we feed our kids It seems to take too much time to eat good or too much money. All of these things tend to take precedence over just enjoying real food. Let's take the negative out of food. Let's teach our little ones to enjoy good and whole foods and help them see eating together as one of their favorite parts of the day.
We are going to try to slow down, not be anxious, but be consistent about what our family eats and most of all make it something we enjoy doing together.
As I was researching I found a great blog. A mom who has great recipes for healthy delicious lunches for kids and meals. http://www.100daysofrealfood.com/
If you have any ideas of how you have implemented this in your family. Please share in the comments. I have talked with some of you who have some really neat ideas. I would love for others to hear.